FEATURE

When Home Is Suddenly Gone: How you can help when a tragedy strikes

BY DAN MAROIS

There are some phone calls you never forget.

On February 5, my daughter called to say she was about ten minutes from arriving home when her husband called to tell her that a pickup truck had crashed into their house. The driver was impaired and traveling about 80 mph in a 25-mph zone. He hit two parked cars, went airborne and crashed into the side of the house. My son-in-law and six-year-old grandson were home and found themselves falling through the living room floor and into the basement as the truck entered the side of their house.

The driver died in the crash, but, miraculously, everyone else was okay, except for minor bruises and a lot of trauma. The house was not. Built in 1840, it had survived nearly two centuries, but the damage was so severe that it could no longer be occupied.

As a father, your first thought is whether everyone is safe. Once you know they are, the reality of what happened starts to sink in. They couldn’t go home.

Think about that for a minute. Your house is still standing, but you can’t live in it. Your clothes are there. Your photographs are there. Important papers are there. All the things that make a house a home are suddenly behind a door you can’t simply open. My daughter and her family found themselves in temporary housing, trying to figure out what came next.

Their Realtor, who had helped them purchase their first home, stepped in again when they needed to find another one. They have since purchased a new home, but they aren’t living there yet. It needs extensive repairs, so they remain in temporary housing, waiting for the day they can finally move in.

Buying another house didn’t immediately mean they were home.

That distinction has stayed with me. It also got me thinking about the role a Realtor and/or Realtors can play when something happens that has nothing to do with a normal real estate transaction.

Their Realtor wasn’t the only person who reached out. The contractor who had put a new roof on their house called. Another contractor sent a card and said that if they needed anything, he was available. None of these people could undo what happened. They didn’t need to. They simply showed that they cared.

Remember, the relationships Realtors build with clients don’t necessarily end when the closing papers are signed. Sometimes those relationships become important for reasons nobody could have anticipated.

Pick Up the Phone

If you hear that a former client has lost their home to a fire, flood, accident or some other tragedy, call them. You don’t need the perfect thing to say. There probably isn’t one.

“I’m sorry. I heard what happened. Is there anything I can do?”

That may be enough. Sometimes people aren’t looking for an answer. They just need to know someone was thinking about them.

Know Who Can Help

Realtors know a lot of people who know how to get things done: contractors, roofers, plumbers, electricians, movers, insurance professionals, lenders and attorneys. When someone’s life has been disrupted, those connections can matter.

Maybe they need someone to look at the damage. Maybe they need temporary storage or help retrieving belongings. You may not be able to solve the problem, but you might know someone who can help with the next one.

That’s one of the less obvious benefits of being a Realtor. You spend years building a network of people who can help solve problems. Sometimes those relationships become valuable in circumstances nobody expected.

Don’t Make It About Real Estate

This may be the most important part.

When someone’s home has just been destroyed, they aren’t thinking about buying another house. They’re trying to figure out where they will sleep, what they need and what happens tomorrow. Give them some room.

If buying another home eventually becomes the right answer, you can be a tremendous help. But let the client get there. There is a difference between being helpful and being opportunistic. People know the difference, especially when they’re going through a difficult time.

In my daughter’s case, the Realtor was there when the time came to start looking at another home. That was valuable. But the relationship came first and the real estate transaction came later.

Just Be There

We spend a lot of time in this magazine talking about listings, contracts, closings, market statistics, legislation and the business of real estate. All of that matters. But underneath all of it is something pretty simple: People remember how you treated them when life wasn’t going according to plan.

The loss my daughter and her family have experienced is hard to grasp. It will be quite a while before they feel completely safe at home again. They are moving forward, and that’s what I want for them.

But I still become hopelessly sad when my grandson remembers a favorite toy he had that is “back in the broken house,” as he calls it. That is the part that stays with me.

Watching this happen has given me a different appreciation for the role Realtors can play in people’s lives. You help people buy and sell homes. You help people move. You build relationships.

And sometimes, when someone’s life has been turned upside down, the best thing you can do is simply show up.